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First Date Do’s and Don’ts.

By KerryNo Comments

When you start dating, following a few rules of thumb will help you be more successful. It’s tempting to avoid restating the basics, but the truth is, we all forget them from time to time. Dating is about two people coming together to get to know one another and find out whether they are compatible, then enjoying each other’s company and eventually forming a close bond. During this process, there are some important guidelines you should remember:

Dating should always be fun, and it’s as much your responsibility as it is your partner’s to ensure that it is. When you’re dating, make sure you do everything you can to make the time you spend together enjoyable.

Eye contact is crucial, and it’s good etiquette to give your date as much of your attention as possible. They should feel like they are the only person in the room. Do not use a date as an excuse for general partying.

Always be courteous and complimentary. Your date has made an effort to look nice for you, and your negative opinions and comments are unwelcome at this stage.

Never ogle your date. It’s rude, and it proves that all you care about is the other person’s physical appearance. This will turn a woman off faster than almost anything else.

Always show up for a date, unless you’ve given notice and let the other person know you have to cancel. Standing someone up is not acceptable, and it shows contempt for your prospective date by wasting their time. That kind of arrogance is detestable.

Always be on time, and never keep your date waiting. If your transportation is unreliable, plan ahead and leave early so you can be there when the other person arrives. Being late shows a lack of respect for your date and illustrates how disorganized you are.

Never be flashy or extravagant. There’s no need to attempt to impress your partner with your wealth and importance. It shows no taste whatsoever to throw your credit card around and order expensive champagne, unless you’re only after cheap thrills and do not care how it makes you look in front of the person you’re trying to get to know.

Smoking excessively during a date is bad form, unless your partner also enjoys chain-smoking. In general, smoking in a restaurant will do nothing for your image and shows crass disregard for others.

Don’t be arrogant on your date, and try to avoid talking about politics and/or religion in the early stages. You may be very opinionated on certain topics, but that does not mean you’re right, or that your opinions won’t offend the person you’re with. Arrogance makes most people feel uncomfortable, so avoid it at all costs.

Never argue or be rude to others during your date — it simply is unacceptable. You’re trying to show the other person your best qualities, so arguing about the tip or whether the wine is chilled enough will make you look like a fool.

Be a good listener, and don’t talk your date to death. Listening shows interest and the ability to compromise. If your idea of a date is talking about yourself and your opinions all night, then do the world a favour and stay at home alone.

Dress well. In this day and age, there is absolutely no excuse for looking shabby. Dressing poorly shows laziness and will do nothing to make you look good. Furthermore, it shows a lack of respect for your date, who has more than likely made an effort to dress nicely.

Make an effort to be clean and smell good. Make sure you’re clean-shaven (where applicable), freshly showered and smell nice. It costs you nothing except a bottle of good perfume/cologne and some soap.

Never swear or use bad language. It will make you sound like an idiot. If you want to find the person of your dreams, you must treat them with respect.

Never discuss your other dates or how many people you’ve slept with. It’s rude and shows you have no class.

Even if you don’t like your date, don’t be quick to give them a hard time. Your partner is human and, like you, deserves to always to be treated with respect. You can still have a good time hanging out with someone you’re not attracted to, so treating them badly just because they’re not your type is unacceptable. Rudeness is not allowed.

Never tell lies on a date to get someone into bed or to try to make yourself sound good. You will be found out, and then you will be rejected. Tell the truth, or avoid a subject if necessary.

The man should pick up the dinner tab on the first date, and it’s probably a bad idea to discuss money at all at this stage. Many people feel that financial discussions are crass and lack sophistication.

Make sure your date feels comfortable at all times, and never do anything that might make them uncomfortable. Also, a man should always make sure his date gets home safely in a cab or by other means.

Never try to sleep with someone on the first date. Sex comes later. If you sleep together too early, chances are it will be over before it began.

Be as entertaining and witty as possible, and never rely on getting drunk as a fall-back plan. Drinking too much on a date shows that you have no respect for your partner and makes a mockery of the whole situation.

Call when you say you’ll call, and never leave someone hanging. If you didn’t have a good time on your date, don’t falsely promise anything or leave the door open. Doing so shows great disrespect for the other person and it’s much easier for everyone if you’re honest about how you feel.

Never pretend to be single when you’re not. Telling your companion late in the game that you’re taken is very inconsiderate. Date only when you are single.

Feb 21

Chat up lines for Men to use on Women.

By admin5 Comments

Here are some chat up lines that men can use with women. If they don’t work, then dont blame us.

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
I seem to have lost my phone number, could I borrow yours?
Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?
Excuse me, I’m a little short on cash, would you mind if we shared a cab home.
You might not be the most beautiful girl in the world, but beauty is only a light switch away.
That’s a sexy dress you are wearing. It would look even better on my bedroom floor.
What’s a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine??
Hello, I’m Mr Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
It’s your lucky day. My girlfriend dumped me last night, so I’m back on the singles market.
Hello, I’m a stranger in this town, could you direct me to your house?
Excuse me, I noticed you did not notice me.
I read the future. From what I could read in your palm, it says that tonight you will invite me on a date.
You should not be always so picky. I am not.
Have you ever been arrested? It is got to be illegal to look as fine as you.
I am sorry to bother you, but I think it is time for us to meet each other.
Excuse me, I am lost. Can you give me indications to your heart?
Excuse me if I am mistaken, but didn’t we have some fun yesterday at just about this hour?
Hello, I am a thief, and I am here to steal your heart.
Excuse me, do you have a phone? I need to call to heaven and say I have found an angel.
Excuse me, I like you and I got tired of waiting for you to make the first move.

The team at Matchmeup have not used these lines at any club or pub and the ones that have are still single, If you have any that work then please let us know. Tomorrow we will list the best lines for women to use on men.

Matchmeup x

Feb 15

How to avoid Internet Dating Scams.

By Kerry2 Comments

No one wants to think they could be taken advantage by an internet dating scam, and yet hundreds of thousands of people are every single year. In fact, the US Embassy to Russia receives reports every single day from people concerned they’ve been scammed by a Russian single looking for love, and the U.S. Postal Service has created a video about the same topic on its FakeChecks.org website.

So how do you avoid falling prey to an internet dating scam in the first place? Take heed of the following red flags and you’ll be much more aware, prepared and ready should someone try and take advantage of you.

Email Discrepancies.
Have you ever exchanged emails with someone you met through an internet dating site, just to wonder if its the same person who is replying to your messages each time? Or perhaps you’ve briefly thought to yourself that the person on the other end of the communication really needs to employ a spell-checker.

Neither of these email discrepancies are cause for alarm; a lot of people aren’t very good with spelling and grammar, and they may be writing English as a second language. But if more than one of the following email discrepancies pop up during the course of your communications, it may be an internet dating scam.

* Communication is vague, difficult to understand or is repeated.
* Immediate (within 15 minutes) responses are received every time you send a message, with no discussion beforehand as to when you’ll be online.
* Email messages change in tone, language, style or grammar throughout the communication. This could evolve over time, or it could be apparent in just one email.
* A sob story is shared early on that changes quickly from an annoyance into an emergency – and only you can help.

Appropriate Responses
It can be very heady to have an ongoing email chat with someone who is focused entirely on you. In fact, this is a great sign that the person on the other end of the conversation is truly interested and invested in learning more about who you are.

Where the danger lies however, is not their interest in you as a person, but rather that they don’t offer any detailed, personal information about themselves in return, or doesn’t really answer your emails in a personal manner, but rather changes the topic with each contact.

Appropriate responses are integral to determining whether or not the relationship you are creating is based in reality and not a potential internet dating scam. Could the person emailing you be merely copying and pasting responses from a pre-determined outline or script, or do their emails really seem to “get” you and offer some sort of individualized attention?

Being asked for Money and/or cashing a cheque.
Most singles who have tried meeting people from online dating sites have come across this telltale internet dating scam sign: being asked to either cash someone’s check or money order for them, or being asked outright for money. The story varies somewhat with each internet dating scam, but the intention remains the same: robbing you of your hard earned cash.

If somebody asks you to wire them cash online – no matter what the reason, no matter how plausible or sad it sounds – don’t. But if you feel compelled to do it anyway, at least read FraudAid’s legal responsibility page, first. It details the ramifications you may face should you choose this route, no matter where you or the internet dating scam artist lives.

Unrealistic or Fake photos.
Although cliche, the saying holds true for internet dating scams: if the person’s photo looks too good to be true, that’s because it probably is.

Of course models, actors and other extremely attractive people want to find love too, and you may very well have lucked out in the attractiveness category with the person you are communicating with online. But if your online date also falls into one of the other internet dating scam categories listed here, then you may want to do a bit more investigating, first.

Related Content: Both AntiScam.org and Russian Woman Blacklist have posted photos and details about hundreds of known internet dating scam “personalities”.

Feb 11

Writing messages to other members.

By Kerry6 Comments

How you write messages to other members is just as important as how you wrote your online dating profile. The main objective of writing to others is to impress them but enjoying yourself at the same time. Good communication skills are essential for impressing a potential date along with good grammar. A great advantage of writing messages on a dating website is that you can think about what you want to say giving you the opportunity to put your best messages forward.

Writing Messages – General Advice

The most important thing you can do before you send a message is to check it thoroughly. Look for possible grammar or spelling mistakes. You want to come across as being well educated and composed. If it helps, you could write your messages in Word where you can do a spell check just to make sure it is correct. It is also advised not to use internet slang and phrases such as “lol” and not to shorten words to numbers. Some people find it difficult reading messages made up of internet slang. Try to be yourself when writing a message and stay true to your character. If the person you are writing to says something that you don’t agree with, don’t pretend that you agree with them otherwise you will not be staying true to your character. Don’t message someone more than once a day without a response as you may come across as being desperate. There is no harm in a little flirting when writing a message, but don’t overdo it, so dirty talk and pictures are best avoided.

Help! What do I write?

The easiest way to write messages to other members is to ask questions. This will show that you are interested in the person you are messaging and will make sure that the message you write isn’t just all about you. Start with general unrestricted questions that aren’t intrusive and try to avoid questions to do with money and sensitive topics. By asking intrusive questions you may come across as being obsessed, a stalker, or even trying to steal someone’s identity. Try not to ask a long list of questions that will take an extensive time to write answers to. The last thing you want to do is sound like you are interrogating the person you are messaging, aim to make your message flow like a conversation. It is important to think carefully about the questions you wish to ask. Before you write any questions, check that they are questions you would feel comfortable answering if you were asked them and it may help if you imagine you are asking the questions face to face. Safe topics to ask questions on or write about could include; hobbies, films, music, work, pets, food, sport and general interests. Bear in mind that because you have asked your potential date questions, you may be asked similar questions back, so be prepared for this.

Responding to a message or contact request

It is entirely up to you whether or not you choose to reply to a contact request or message. There is no rule that says you must reply to all contact requests or messages so don’t feel forced to do so. If you don’t feel comfortable replying to a message or contact request, then don’t. Replying should be fun and not make you feel uncomfortable.

It is sometimes easier when responding to a message rather than starting a conversation, as the person you are answering will have set the ball rolling and will probably have given you some starting points in the way of questions. Once you have answered the questions it is a good idea to ask similar questions back, or ask some of your own but remembering not to be intrusive. It is up to you how quickly you respond to a message. There is no reason to delay responding, unless you don’t have the time or opportunity, but on the other hand there is no rush. Send a reply in your own time making sure you are happy with what you have written.

Getting a response

Don’t expect to get an immediate response from a contact request or a message. Try to be patient and check your inbox on a daily basis. It may take a day, a week or even longer for someone to reply to you. Remember that not everyone uses a computer everyday; some people may use a friend or relatives computer therefore relying on other people before they can check their inbox. Some people like to take their time writing messages to make sure they are entirely happy with what they have written, so their response may be a little delayed. Try to remember that everyone has something going on in their lives, so don’t be disappointed if you don’t get a rapid response.

Why didn’t they reply?

That is one question you will rarely find the answer to. If you haven’t had a response from a contact request or even if you have been sending messages to someone and they suddenly stop replying, it doesn’t mean it is due to anything you have done. How can you have done something wrong by just sending a contact request? The best way to deal with not having a response is simply to just move on. You may be disappointed if you have been chatting to someone regularly who you feel you have a connection with and they just stop, but you mustn’t let that one person stop you from having fun chatting to others. There could be a perfectly valid reason for someone not replying to you such as; they may have met someone else, they are on holiday, their computer may be broken, they may be unwell, or have work commitments. It could just simply be that they aren’t interested in you and they don’t know how to tell you, so ignoring messages seems like the easiest option for them, although it may come across as being quite harsh. Remember that some people are quite shy and it has taken a lot of courage for them to join a dating website, so it may just take time for them to pluck up the courage to reply to contact requests or messages. It may seem like another excuse, but it could also be the truth. You must remember that just because you send someone a contact request it doesn’t mean that they are obliged to reply. Instead of being disappointed about the members who don’t reply to you, concentrate your enthusiasm on the members who do reply to you.

Feb 09

How dating has changed in the last 30 years.

By adminNo Comments

As time and technology have progressed the ways of finding romance have changed. The Internet and World Wide Web have spawned growth and popularity in the world of online dating. It has become acceptable and even commonplace for one to say that they found their partner on a dating site. Let’s take a brief history course on the evolution of dating from the bar scene to the present day and age where it’s easier to find the love of your life in a virtual world than it is in the real world.

In the 1980’s and early 90’s the bar scene was the way to find love or lust. Dark smoky rooms echoing with thumping pop songs or techno were filled with sweaty, gyrating bodies smelling of Kouros all searching for spots on the dance floor. Your best game as a man was to have a great line and a prayer that you didn’t get slapped in the face. For the ladies, it was a lot easier due to the sheer ratio of men to women. Of course, if you could avoid the overly macho idiots, you were ten steps ahead of your competition.

If you were lucky enough to find a partner to dance with, you were blessed with the privilege of yelling over the music and the crowd in order to exchange names. When all was said and done, you knew nothing about your dance partner and there was a distinct possibility that he or she wouldn’t even give you their number. The meat market was open, but not everyone was buying.

In the mid-90’s we were given the World Wide Web. This virtual environment quickly spawned Web sites with chat rooms where written records of wanton lust were archived on servers that sat between lovers who were often on opposite sides of the globe. From the beginning, the Web has had a reputation for augmenting the idea that sex and love are two of the most important things in life. The better you were at creating lust-filled prose, the more response you would get. Unfortunately, many of these sites had no privacy. Eventually, if you spent enough time learning about a person, you might get the opportunity to meet them. This type of behaviour also raised the distinct possibility that you were on your way to meet a psycho, sex-crazed, serial killer.

As time went on, a more progressive form of online dating evolved around the world. Dating services that provided an online and secure environment began to pop-up. Most of the sites catered to single women and men though, and provided a more standard form of dating. If you were a married wife looking for a bit of love, good luck, the site would weed you out in a heartbeat, unless you lied on your profile. Even if you were accepted into the site, there was no guarantee that you would find what you were looking for. Most sites did not cater to gay men or women, nor did they promote casual meet ups for no-strings-attached sex. If dating sites were a sexual position in the late 90’s they would have been the “missionary position”.

The new millennium brought about a refreshed and invigorated view of relationships around the globe. Inhibitions began to fall away and dating Web sites began to cater to as many different orientations as possible. Obviously, taboos such as paedophilia and bestiality are still, thankfully, taboo and in most cases illegal. However, a new view of dating from many different standpoints has taken root. Web sites now cater to both straight and gay people and one that is growing fast is Dating Granny. They also provide services for those who are looking to fulfil fantasies that they might not be able to fulfil within their own marriage. Couples seeking singles or singles seeking couples have become commonplace and casual sex with an “f-buddy” have become a main draw for many of these sites.

The technology behind these sites has also become more sophisticated. Profiles are matched based not only on gender, but likes and dislikes, sexual orientation, casual encounters, fantasy and many other bits of data such as proximity. Safety has also become a major issue as well and age verification has become an important precaution with these sites.

Online dating is no longer a game of anonymity that hides behind a phosphorous screen in the middle of the night in mum or dad’s basement. The sites are legitimate and when used with common sense, safe. They work and have provided many people with an excellent outlet for their sexual needs.

Feb 09

Online Dating Etiquette.

By Kerry1 Comment

Today, dating online is a new and exciting discovery that is filled with endless possibilities. Online Dating refers to being introduced to potential dates online, getting to know other people through chat, email and other services and potentially taking a relationship, formed online, into the real world. Typically the goal of online dating is developing a more intimate relationship.

Whilst cyber dating, you are able to dress however you want and have your hair any way you want, but you still have to have some online dating etiquette. This means others you communicate with will feel a part of you and everything you say will be looked at very critically.

As the number of online users steadily increases, so has the need to set standards for behavior, manners and proper etiquette.

General Guidelines of Online Dating Etiquette

1. Being rude is never justified. It is important to have nice manners and remember what you think is funny others may deem insulting.

2. Profanity should never be used online.

3. This is not set up as a game remember these are real people who have real feelings.

4. Only cyber-search if you are seriously looking for a partner or friend and state your intentions clearly. This cannot be done for kicks or fun.

5. Be a good listener. Almost everyone likes to talk about themselves and this can often lead to great communication.

6. Do not make statements or ask questions that puts someone on the defensive. This includes subjects like religion and politics. These can be discussed in person when you get to know someone better.

7. Capitals and abbreviations should not be used while in a conversation. Capitals indicate yelling and abbreviations can many times be hard to understand and can be annoying. Presentation is key when trying to attract or impress someone else.
8. Do not seem desperate or too eager and do not push anyone into doing something they do not want to do.

9. Determine what your goals are! Are you online dating for entertainment, to hang out, or look for a one night stand or a long term relationship? To determine this you need to determine what your goals are and work towards them.

10. Talk to your friends first. Online dating is used by many different types of people. Ask people you trust which sites worked for them and which ones they liked. It is better to trust someone’s opinion than to just randomly pick a site.

11. To have the best experience, you have to be honest. You cannot control what others say or do, but you can control and be accountable for yourself. Honesty is much more attractive.

12. Move at a slow pace. The success of online dating and attracting a lasting relationship is going slow.

Feb 08

What NOT to say on your first date.

By admin1 Comment

Not had great dates in the past? Ever said something on a date that you wished you hadn’t? Well watch this video of some things you should never say on a first date. Click on the photo

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